This is a guest post by Alex Reddle.
There’s an old saying that money makes the world go round. Of course it does, but what also gets my world truly spinning is the thought of all those single women out there who are looking for dates. You don’t have to be some kind of sleazy Lothario to appreciate the finer points of the opposite sex. Sure, there are guys who will objectify women and gauge ‘success’ in terms of the sheer numbers of partners they entice into their bedrooms; unfortunate females who then become ‘conquests’ to be bragged about in the locker room. But such a viewpoint is hopelessly mired in the past, and is typified by those young men who would rather stare at semi-nude newspaper images or unattainable exotic dancers than enter into meaningful relationships.
When I talk about going out to meet single women, it’s not so that I have something to brag to my friends about. It’s simply because hooking up with vibrant, intelligent, sexy females doesn’t have to be part of some secret agenda. It can be deeply fulfilling. And a hell of a lot of fun.
That sense of fun begins when you uncover one of the many online portals that are specifically set up to introduce you to likeminded individuals. Once registered, you can interact with other singletons in a safe, relaxed atmosphere. This experience is at the polar extreme to anything I’ve previously been used to. My weekends used to revolve around jam-packed bars and clubs, where conversations had to be conducted at a similar decibel-level to sergeant majors on a parade ground, and where everyone was out to out-impress everyone else. But once you enter the chat room environment you really do become immersed in the virtual party atmosphere. And nobody will ever be judging you.
Here you can flirt with as many frisky women as you care to send your flirtatious messages to. Sometimes there are smart search options that are designed to assist you in honing down the criteria, enabling you to get to know the ideal naughty single women who will most respond to your chat. This is where these sites really excel themselves. In less-enlightened times, single guys had to rely on chatting-up complete strangers, being introduced to potential partners by third parties, or having blind dates arranged via lonely hearts columns in their local newspaper. That all sounds so archaic it’s laughable, and barely one step beyond cavemen serenading their women with undercooked mammoth steaks. Nowadays the technology is there to assist you on your quest for a fiery female
The database of love
Any reputable website will treat you details with confidence. All the information you provide will be held in a secure database, where your profile can be accessed by females who are keen to find out more about you and your interests. This is an aspect of this type of dating that often gets overlooked. If I’m being perfectly honest, like many of my friends I’m not that enamored with the prospect of having to describe myself in terms of homing in on my key attributes. But there’s no place for false modesty in the virtual dating arena. When setting up a profile I’ve found myself positively encouraged to be honest and above board. Waxing lyrical about my achievements, whether in my career or anywhere else in life, has given me a renewed energy. This, in turn, will be only too apparent to anyone coming across my profile. They’ll be intrigued to find out more.
When the internet communication eventually leads to a date, you can often find that you are already so well acquainted with one another that the all-too illusive chemistry is already there in bundles. And once you have established a rapport, everything else slots into place effortlessly. Chatting, flirting, message exchanging, dating – they all become part of a seamless progression that just seems so natural, especially when compared to the hackneyed chat-up rituals I used to perform when I was chasing women in the more traditional outlets.
The final aspect of online dating that deserves special mention is the way you can control the extent to which you wish to take things to the next level, or simply coast along if that’s your mutual preference. It could be that the person you’ve really clicked with isn’t really looking for anything too serious, in which case you can continue the flirting and chatting. You can get to know each other at your own pace, and if one or both of you wishes to escalate matters, then that’s fine. If you’re only looking for a casual encounter with someone, that’s all well and good. But if you find yourself really falling for your online date, just think of everyone who scoffed that such a thing was possible. Anything is possible.
Running For My Life - from zero to ultramarathoner
The spooky thing about depression is that it sneaks in. There aren’t really trumpets and loud voices announcing: “Hail, hail, this is depression entering the room, all rise!” Nope. It’s slow, silent, creepy. It doesn’t even look like depression. It starts with small isolation thoughts like: “Maybe I shouldn’t get out today, I just don’t feel like going out”. And then it does the same next day. And then the day after that and so on. And then it starts to whisper louder and louder in your ears: “Why would you go outside, you loser? Didn’t have enough yet? Want more people to make fun of how much of a big, fat loser you are?”
And then you start to breath in guilt and shame, instead of air. Every breathe you take is putting more dark thoughts into your body.
Until you get stuck. You can’t move anymore. At all.
If you want to know how I got out of this space, eventually, check out my latest book on Amazon and Kindle.