All your habits, all your memories, all your knowledge, information and learned processes are forming a reality. Your reality. It’s your own interpretation of the world, it’s how you see things, and how you react to them.
It’s what I call the reality within.
Why “within”? Because, most of the time, this reality has nothing to do with the actual, “outside” reality. The reality in which you live. In which you do things. In which you can evolve. The reality within is just an inside energy flow that is keeping you, most of the time, to fully involve your being into a natural living process.
Think at this reality like a virtual reality game that has trapped you into an imaginary universe, and is now constantly tricking you to believe that this is your actual reality. Sounds strange? Maybe it is. But is also true, either you are aware of that now, or not.
Why is this happening? Why we would experience such a thing?
Well, because most of us are not living life to the fullest. We’re not putting all of our energy into “here and now”. Instead, we waste our time by keeping trace of old habits, prejudices or unsolved questions that are hunting our day to day existence. And, most of all, because we are rooting our decisions and actions on some auto-pilot patterns. We are not 100% presents in our lives and we are acting – acting, like in being the actors of our life, not the real characters – by habit, or by what is called a “Pavlovian reflex”. We are drooling not because we are hungry, but because our habit is telling us to drool, while our inner reality is holding our real self in endless discussions, regrets or imaginary realms.
Why? Because we have unfinished stuff. Unsolved conflicts. Uncompleted relationships or things. All those unfinished or uncategorized things in our past life are forming a ball of gravity that is holding our energy.
This reality is often more powerful than the reality you want to belong to. This power makes you feel drained or sad. You are not built to be sad. Sadness is just the effect of not having enough energy to put in your “here and now” actions. Sadness is just the effect of the energy you invested in things that are not even real anymore.
And this reality within is more often the real reason you start something like a personal development strategy. Because you want to change something, right? You start this personal development thing by thinking you want to change yourself, but that’s not the case, you can’t change your self. If you are disciplined enough on your path for personal development, you will eventually find out that you cannot be changed, you are already an extraordinary human being, but what you really can and want to change, is that overwhelming reality within your self. The energy vortex of habits and prejudices that is stopping you to live your life to the highest degree of involvement. Which we happen to call “happiness”, by the way.
You’ll also find soon enough that this reality within is very difficult to change. You have to really dig deep to your twisted roots, and try to reach as deep as you can. Find those roots and start modifying your inner reality with them. Accept them as they are, and build your own roots. You can do that. But it will be a slow, and sometimes even painful, process.
And if you will have enough will, at some point you will start to notice some small changes. But don’t expect sudden progress, just a gradually shift of energy from one reality to another. Because that inner reality is held together by your life energy. If you don’t invest your life energy in it, it will eventually fall apart. But if you conserve your energy into that initial reality, meaning if you will stick together with your old habits or prejudices, you’ll never have enough spare energy to build the new one.
This is why you have to live whatever you chose to live with all your being, invest yourself totally in anything that you do.
And don’t blame somebody else for you being sad or lazy, it’s your and only your responsibility.
Your reality within.