How Goal Setting Works (For Me)

Goals are just milestones. Places where you stop for a while and enjoy the scenery. The trip is what gives you the ultimate thrill, and it will always be like this.

But, as interesting as the trip may be, goals have their own importance. They can either add more awesomeness to the mix or make the whole experience dull and boring. It’s one thing to stop on the side of the road, eating some dust watching how others are passing you by, but it’s a completely different thing to stop at a 5 star hotel, relax, and get your strength together for the next part of the trip. As I said, both are just milestones within a bigger trip, but their quality is different.

Let me share a personal story with you about some goals I set a few years ago. Although these are material goals, closely linked to money, I’m using these examples because they can be easily measured. The same approach works in many other areas, like personal evolution, lifestyle, or relationships.

The Early Years

A few years ago I was spending the majority of my time trying to build an online publishing company. I had a considerable degree of success, some would say, but it involved a considerable degree of personal involvement and time spent making things happening.

At that time, I could barely afford my own car. I was driving a very old Dacia model (a local brand, based on a Renault chassis). It was a wreck. I remember that at times the engine would heat up to the point where it would let out waves of white steam from the hood. Often I had to pull over and replace the water from the expansion recipient. Before going to a meeting, I would always making sure I was carrying around at least 4 liters of water on the back seat. It wasn’t unusual to stop 2-3 times a day to watch the white steam and to replace the water.

So, eventually I decided that it was time to get a new car. A beautiful one. Of course, I couldn’t afford it. I was barely affording the maintenance expenses for my wreck. But I wanted a new, beautiful, and shiny car really bad. So, after browsing a little on the internet I decided I want a Volvo XC90. It was 6 years ago and the model hadn’t even been launched yet, but since one of my niche websites was the biggest car portal in Romania, I was wired to everything that was new in the car industry. I already had a few wallpapers for the upcoming Volvo XC90. Beautiful, shiny pictures.

I set up my computer wallpaper to the most beautiful picture in the whole album. Each morning, it was the first image I saw when I opened my computer. Each evening, before shutting down my laptop, I saw the same image. I had made a very strong commitment. I think I had that wallpaper for more than one year. One day, I decided it would be no more than 3 years until I would have that car.

Time passed and in the process I changed my wallpaper. I also changed my car, but not to a Volvo XC90. I started gradually with a Skoda, then an Opel. At some point, after 3 years of countless hours spent in the office with clients, partners and employees, I realized that I could finally afford a much better car than my Opel Astra.

So I bought an Infiniti FX 35, a huge, powerful and luxurious car, more expensive than a Volvo XC90. That Volvo disappeared from my goal horizon, but the associated lifestyle didn’t. In fact, the goal of having a big, shiny and powerful car (which could act more like a statement of what I was doing at that time), become even stronger.

The whole process took about 6 years. From the moment I set up a certain goal, to the moment that goal became reality, there were around 2100 days. How did I feel the day I drove my new Infiniti home? Exactly the same. I wasn’t different. The car was, but I wasn’t. However, the car was a very clear sign that my intention to change my mindset towards a much more abundant one was working really well. The trip was unfolding in the right direction and this milestone was a very rewarding one.

The Current Situation

Now, this may be an interesting story, but it happened 6 years ago. How about now? What is an easy to measure goal that I have right now, and what exactly am I’m doing to make it happen?

If you read my last post, you already know, but I’ll say it again anyway: I want a jet. A Learjet, to be more precise. I know, I know, it sounds crazy. It may even be crazy. But that won’t stop me from wanting it.

Can I afford a jet right now? You’re kidding me, right? Of course I can’t! Compared to my “car goal” situation, I don’t even have a wreck to call my “first jet”. I have nothing in this area and the financial difference between how I’m doing right now and how I would need to do in order to afford a 17.9 million dollar jet is enormous.

But I’m reading about it. I started to look around for flying courses. I’m enjoying its pictures. I don’t have a wallpaper with it, but one of the tabs of my browser is always opened with that image. I’m “soaking” myself with a jet the same way I soaked with the image of a Volvo XC90.

I want it in 5 years from now. And I’m working towards it.

The Three Stages Of Goal Setting

Those of you familiar with my ebook already know that I’m using a life management framework called “Assess – Decide – Do”. Of course, 6 years ago I didn’t know that I was using that framework in particular. At least, not consciously. But, on a very deep and hard to grasp level, I have always done stuff following this pattern. Now, how can this be related to goal setting?

First Stage: Assess

This is the stage in which you’re pondering how your goal should fit into your life. It’s the stage in which you are wondering, day dreaming, brainstorming, and drifting away in dreams about your goal. This is the part where you are making room to fit your goal into your current lifestyle.

That’s the stage from which I am slowly getting out of now, with my jet goal. I impregnated its image into my daily activity. I made it familiar. I found ways to integrate it into my lifestyle.

6 years ago, wanting a better car had a close relationship with my lifestyle. I had the biggest car portal in Romania, and having a state of the art car was somehow part of my image as an owner.

Right now, I want a location independent lifestyle. Having a jet to support it looks like a good fit.

Second Stage: Decide

This is the stage in which you are signing the contract with your goal. And you do this by placing it into a space/time continuum.

Speaking of my car goal, the decide stage was when I clearly stated that I want the car in a time frame of 3 years, here, in Bucharest.

And speaking of the jet goal, this is the stage where I am right now. I have a clear time/space context in which I can see this goal happening. In this case: I’ll have it in 5 years from now, when I’ll be fully location independent.

Third Stage: Do

This is the most confusing stage for people, because they think they should focus on the goal. There’s a very subtle difference here. And I guess this is the most important difference in my goal setting approach versus other techniques. I’m not advocating a “fixed eye” on the goal. On the contrary. If you start moving towards your goal, you start making it happen, and you don’t have to focus entirely on it. Instead, you should focus on the chosen lifestyle.

That’s a fundamental difference and here’s why.

Focusing on the goal will be like focusing on the hotel. Instead, your focus should be on the trip itself. A goal is just a milestone. The trip is the great thing, not the goal. If you focus on the hotel, you’ll get stuck on the hotel. You may get a nice room, but your trip will be over.

So, in my “goal car” example, once I assessed it (having its wallpaper on my computer for a year) and once I placed it in a time/space context (3 years) the things I did where not directly even really related to this goal. I just continued to work on my business. I constantly improved my lifestyle. I grew up. I just went on with my trip and enjoyed myself.

And, at some point, the goal was already there, on the side of the road, waiting for me to enjoy it.

The Quantum Element

One more thing: you may have noticed that there was a little bit of a difference between what I wanted as a car, and what I got. I wanted a Volvo XC90 and I got an Infiniti FX 35. In this case, I outgoaled myself. I did better than I thought I was able to.

Most of the time this is the case. I set up a certain goal, start working towards it, and then I wake up one day realizing that I have much more than I initially wanted.

I call this the “quantum element”. If you do your job properly, if you stay on the trip, the milestones will be much more rewarding than you can imagine. It’s like reality is suddenly activating some invisible triggers telling you “ok, I know you wanted this, but I’m going to give you that instead, because, well, it’s much more fun”.

But be aware that sometimes this “quantum element” may be working “against” you. You may get a lower vibration. For instance, I am fully aware that I may not get a jet, but only a regular, 4 seater plane. That may happen.

We may not get exactly what we want. Sometimes we get more, sometimes we get less. I think it’s part of a bigger process, which is tightly connected with acceptance and observation. This “quantum element” adds a certain degree of randomness to our trip. Maybe for preventing us from get too wired up in our own little wishes. If we would always get what we want, life would be pretty boring and predictable, isn’t it?

But that’s another story.

Well, 5 years is a lot of time. Since I’m finished with the Assess and Decide part of my jet goal, I’ll just continue to do my work here, on this blog.

And that’s how goal settings works. At least for me.

The Magic Fairy Exercise

You know the joke with the lost Bedouin? No? How come? It’s a very common joke, not to mention it has quite a deep meaning. OK, I will get you out of ignorance, just relax and read on:

Although it’s quite uncommon for a Bedouin to get lost in the desert, one of them apparently did it at some point in history. After days of walking around the sand dunes, without water, food and nobody to comfort him around, the lost Bedouin finally meets a magic fairy. You know the type: thin, translucent and surprisingly able to fulfill any wish you could possibly have.

Imagine our Bedouin’s surprise when that cute floating lady whispers to him in crystal clear voice: “Oh, you mighty Bedouin, you found me, I’m the magic fairy of this part of the desert and I can fulfill you 3 wishes.”

The lost Bedouin closed his eyes and mumbled: “Now if you would be so kind to disappear when I’ll open my eyes again, that would be great. I’m thirsty, tired and alone, and the only thing that could make things worse is a stupid mirage. Now, go!”

To his even bigger surprise, the magic fairy was still there when he opened his eyes again. And she looked a little bored too: “Ok, are we going to play this again? Just told you I’m a magic fairy, what do you want from me to believe? Can we skip to the wishes, please?”

A little puzzled, our Bedouin decided it’s better to play the way she said. After all, he had nothing to lose: if she was for real, then he got 3 wishes fulfilled, if she was a mirage, he was properly entertained..

“Ok, so wait a minute, I just have to think exactly what I need”, Bedouin said.

“No worries, magic fairy replied, I’m here to serve you”.

After a few minutes, our Bedouin decided he knows what he wants:

“First thing, because I’m walking for days in this desert without water, I would like a lot of water, right? Can you make it that I will always have water on me?”

The fairy seemed to think for a few seconds and then replied: “Ok, I can do that. Next?”

“The second thing it’s something a little bit special. You know, I had this tan skin for as long as I remember my face. Now that I met you and you said you can fulfill any possible wish, I want to take advantage of this opportunity. Although it may sound a little bit silly… Can you?… Can you make me white? Ok, I said it!”

Magic fairy looked very carefully at our Bedouin and after a few seconds replied: “Yeap, I can do that too. Last one, please?”

“Well, you know, a man is a man. And a man has needs. Lots of needs. I think you know where I’m heading here. But I’ll just say it out loud: I want to be touched by lots of women. Daily if possible. Lots of women. Daily. Can you do this?”

Fairy acknowledged and before moving her magic wand, she whispered again, in crystal clear voice, to our lost Bedouin: “So, you want to always have water, you want to be white and to be touched by lots of women, is that correct?”

“Absolutely”, the Bedouin replied.

One short move of the magic wand, a short mumbled magic formula and then our fairy disappeared.

The next second, our Bedouin woke up as a flush toilet in a crowded ladies’ room: always filled with water, colored in white and touched by women daily. Lots of women. Daily.

Yeah, I laughed too. But behind laughing, this joke tells a lot about our own goal setting approach.

Goal Setting and Your Private Magic Fairy

How many times you did your goal setting the same way the lost Bedouin did? How many times your dreams were blurred or inconsistent? How many times you followed impersonal social patterns just to find yourself in a totally different place than you wanted to be in? I know I did it at least a thousand times.

Sooner or later, if you play your cards well, the magic fairy will make your wish come true. Call it destiny, call it Law Of Attraction, call it the Universe, call it whatever you want, but the thing is, if you wish something, in the end you’ll get it. That’s the good news. The bad news is that in the end you’ll get it. So be very careful what you’re wishing for. Goal setting is a tricky thing.

At the core of our lives there’s nobody else but us. Our current situation is the direct result of what we dreamed about, of what we wanted to, of what we intended to happen. We’re all having our own private magic fairy, only we’re not always able to see her. But she’s there, and she’s doing exactly what we’re telling her to do: she’s fulfilling our wishes.

The Magic Fairy Goal Setting Exercise

One thing that could really help you avoid this lost Bedouin situation is what I call “the magic fairy goal setting” exercise. It’s a very simple thing you can do, not to mention it can be really fun. How it works?

Every time you establish some goal, put yourself in the lost Bedouin shoes. Imagine you’ve just met the magic fairy and you’re up to have 3 wishes fulfilled. How would you set up your goal? How will the wishes will sound? Compare “I want a better career” with ” I want to do something that I love, I want to be paid for and I want to feel good while I’m doing it”. Compare “I want a better relationship” with “I want a woman to love, a woman who will understand me, who will love me back and who will support me. I want to be able to talk with her openly, to have fun together and to enjoy our journey”. Quite a difference, right?

Doesn’t matter if you write the wishes down, although in the beginning it will surely help. What will matter in this exercise is to visualize the whole discussion between the magic fairy and the Bedouin. What matters is to remember that what you wish for will come true, and if you’re not 100 percent exact, you can end up as a flush toilet.

What follows is a short guide of how to create “magic fairy proof” wishes. In other words, a practical approach to avoid the lost Bedouin situation by using a better goal setting approach.

1. Be Precise

Tell “exactly” what you want. Don’t make assumptions. Magic fairies are usually pretty busy (we’re over 6 billion people to be served on this planet only, so they have plenty of work to do). Don’t just mumble metaphors like: “I want to be touched by lots of women. Daily” because the magic fairy will pick the simplest first available choice. Which, most of the time, it’s NOT what you want.

2. Be Direct

Don’t expect your fairy to understand by herself what you’re wishing for. Magic fairies are not designed to handle our goal setting process, this is our job. They’re designed to make what we’re saying real, which is a very difficult job in itself. You have to be very direct and put shyness apart. If you’re not telling out loud what you’re wanting to happen, you’re getting something extremely different. You may become white, if that’s what you wish for, but you may become the wrong kind of white, so to speak.

3. Be Fearless

Too many times our wishes are a result of a certain imbalance in our current environment. Our lost Bedouin wanted a lot of water, because he experienced loss of water extensively. So he wanted a lot of water, by fear of losing it again. His goal setting process was rooted in fear. And every time we’re acting based on fear, we’re getting strange results. We’re wishing loads of money, for instance, without caring what we have to do for it. And in the process of getting loads of money we also get other people to literally shit on our heads for it.

4. Be Confident

It will happen. Really. Once you intended something, it will happen. So, setting goals “just like that” will have the same effect as setting goals “seriously”. Everything you wish for it’s happening, period. So, if you’re wishing something at all, you’d better doing it with confidence, being prepared for it. Just sketching your goals, thinking it will just be a “dry test” without really happening, will put you in the lost Bedouin situation: you may wake up as a flush toilet in some ladies’ room.

5. Be Consistent

If you didn’t get it for the first time, don’t despair. Adjust, improve and refine your wishes and then put up the intention again. Our joke is describing only one meeting with the magic fairy but the untold truth is that we can meet this lady as often as we want, if we really want to. So, keep your precise, direct, fearless and confident wishes handy, because you never know when your private magic fairy will jump again in front of you, ready to make them come true.

My Magic Fairy Request To You

Now, let’s put this to work. Let’s have a magic fairy exercise. In this specific context, you, the reader, will be my magic fairy. Exactly, you can fulfill me 3 wishes. Yes, of course you can.

So, in order to make my wishes understandable to you, I will try to follow the 5 steps in the goal setting exercise from above. First, here are the wishes:

1. I want you to spread the word about this post

And I want you to use specifically these social media outlets: delicious, twitter, digg and stumbleupon. Just click on the links and the magic will start to happen. Of course, after you click the links, you will share this blog post with your friends (by email or using specific social media tools). No need to get out on the streets and shout about it, though (I’m trying to be precise here, ok?).

2. I want you to write a blog post about your own magic fairy exercise

I’m sure you’ve been in the lost Bedouin shoes at some point in your life. There must have been a moment in your life when your wishes were misunderstood. Write a blog post about it, let it out, clear it over. Try to translate the mistaken wish into a better one. If you don’t have a blog, write in a journal. If you don’t keep a journal, start keeping one (private magic fairies do read journals, believe me).

3. I want you to link back to this blog post

So I can identify you (and pass it on to my own magic fairy, if yours is too busy at the moment). Again, if you don’t have a blog, you don’t have to link back to this. But if you do, put a link back and let the world know you’re working on your magic fairy relationship.

Now, how these wishes are following the magic fairy goal setting guidelines?

I am precise: I gave you the exact links for spreading the word.

I’m being direct: no need to tell you that I want you to make the world better, just share this post, that would be all.

I’m being fearless: I’ve been featured before on social media and I know what it takes, I even upgraded my hosting plan to cope with this. Being featured on delicious or lifehacker could really put your server to your knees. I’m prepared, go on, hit me up.

I’m being confident: I know this will happen. I just know.

And, finally, I’m being consistent: all my 3 wishes are related. All 3 wishes combined will (hopefully ) have the same effect: will spread the word about this post and help people improve their goal setting process.

Now, I wonder if I forgot something…

Translations of this article: Dutch.

The First Year Of Blogging – Personal Benefits

Welcome to th final article from the series about my first year of blogging as a business. In this article I will outline the personal benefits of having a personal development blog as a main business. If you came here directly, you may want to have a look at the other articles:

The First Year Of Blogging – Writing
The First Year Of Blogging – Promotion
The First Year Of Blogging – Money

Self Discipline

By far the most important and visible benefit of having a blog as a business was self discipline. I actually had to write content, to promote the blog and to make sure I find ways to make money out of it. And I had to do this persistently for more than one year. I didn’t have anyone to call in if I was sick, I couldn’t postpone posting an article because I was bored or depressed, I had no one to promote the blog for me. No employees to blame if something went wrong, no excuses.

This is a tremendous self-discipline booster. I’ve always been a self-discipline freak and, as you may guess, running a business for more than 10 years requires a lot of commitment and dedication. But this was different. When I had the business I was competing most of the time with my competition. As a blogger I was competing with myself. I had to find ways to keep myself motivated and to constantly improve the blog. Of course, the main benefit of having a personal development blog is that you can transform virtually every experience into a blog post. As long as you learn something from it, of course.

Blogging Skills

The second benefit is related to my blogging skills. If I read some of the articles I wrote one year ago I can hardly believe I was the one who wrote them. And yet, I was the one who wrote them. Keeping a blog consistently from more than one year proved to be a fantastic tool for sharpening my skills. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still pretty far from what I want to be, but I am far more than I used to be.

And so, it wasn’t any surprise at all when I started to receive, in the last few weeks, a lot of requests for writing for other blogs. For some of them I did guest posts, but others are asking me to write as a paid blogger. I couldn’t even imagine one year ago that I would be in such a position. And yet, I am in such a position now. There is no other way to become better at something than doing it unceasingly.

Social Skills

During the last year I interacted with more people than in my last 3 years as a business owner. Yes, that’s true. I think I interacted on a constant basis with more than 100 people. And that would be only the close circle. Beyond that circle there are at least 1000 people which whom I interact every now and then. Of course, those interactions are taking place in the social media or directly on my blog. As a comparison, when I had the business I didn’t interact with more than 30 people on a daily basis, and that was when I had pretty hectic and busy days.

Now that’s a fantastic social skills booster. Even if the interaction is not taking place in the real world, it still challenges your core social expertise and resources. Even if you time box your social interactions, grouping them together in chunks like Twitter or Facebook, you still have to get through those interactions. Not to mention the fact that some of them are leading to real life interaction, like the first Steve Pavlina workshop I am attending in Vegas these days.

Goal Setting

One of the things that got strengthened this year was my capacity to set up goals. Again, I didn’t have any serious issues with that, but not having serious issues with something doesn’t mean it cannot be improved. This is exactly what happened with my goal setting capacity. Blogging has the advantage to give you a very fast feed-back. If you do something bad, you’ll know it very fast and you will be able to take measures.

In time, this back and forth game of setting goals and adjusting them to reality somehow crossed the blogging territory limits into other areas of my life. I can be better now at setting up goals in other areas, like fitness or eating or traveling. There is this subtle learning that occurs when you’re applying self-discipline to a specific area of your life for more than one year. This knowledge and intuition took me from writing only 15 posts per month up to creating huge lists posts (both in terms of length and popularity) like 100 Ways To Live A Better Life.

Goal Achievement

Well, that’s one of the things I should celebrate. Goal achievement, although highly praised in any personal development course, is heavily underrated in real life situations. Everybody teaches you how to achieve your goals, but no one tells you what happens after that. It’s a celebration, people, that’s what happens after you achieve your goals. I had one successful year of blogging as a business and I’m really proud of it.

Goal achievement could be a really dry and boring process if you don’t put a little bit of joy in it. If you don’t take the time to be happy about what you’ve done you could as well be a robot. Precise, exact but soulless. After one year of blogging, a year filled with a lot of challenges, difficulties and successes, all I can say is I’m really happy about that. It went really well and although during this series – and most of the time during the last year – I’ve blogged about my experiences, the real reason behind creating a successful personal development blog is not me.

It’s you. Thank you.

Reaching Next Level

Personal development is all about growth. Is all about getting over your limits, overcoming crisis and reaching the next level in your life. But sometimes, being so immersed in managing the trip, we lose contact with the scenery. We’re so busy setting goals, applying that productivity technique, igniting that new networking opportunity, that we can’t really say if we did it.

Ever had that feeling? The feeling that says: I don’t know if I really did it? I don’t know if I reached the next level? Well, I had this, many times. There were periods in my life when all I did was working and never assessing. Growing but never acknowledging the growth. Running but never looking if I crossed some finish line. How to tell if I actually reached the next level in my life?

The New You

Personal development is a race in which you compete against yourself. You can’t really see your competitor. In sports (or in other direct competitions) victory is a matter of making the other one lose. Whenever he lose, you win, is that simple. Well, in personal development is not that simple. Your competitor can’t lose, simply because the competitor is another part of you. And you can only win.

This is why knowing if you really reached the next level is quite a delicate question.

First of all, because you can’t always put your fingers on the next level. You don’t always know what it looks like. You feel the need for change, you feel the urge to grow, but don’t have quite a clear image of what does this mean. So you substitute it with a goal. You set a specific goal and expect that once you reached it, you’ll graduate to a next level. Goal setting is the most widely used substitute for next level reaching. But goals are always external, goals are things you project outside you. While the next level is something you experience with all your being, inside.

Once you get out of the normal goal setting metrics, you don’t really have many clues to tell you if you really did it. Of course, you reached your goals, but your goals are not you. You reached a certain milestone in your life, but your own being is not measurable by milestones, you are a continuous human entity.

For some time, I tried to apply a simple mathematical rule to this. I tried to assess my growth in terms of numbers, or money. If I had a significant surge in my revenue, well, that should make for quite a spectacular next level, isn’t it? The problem was I didn’t always felt like I reached the next level. Of course, there was a measurable growth in my finances, but this metric seemed way too small for the big picture.

I tried to apply other metrics, all based on some sort of numbers, with no significant success. It took me a lot of time to realize that the next level is a specific concept in personal development and it needs a specific approach. You can’t use mathematics for that, nor money. Goal setting is ok, milestone checking is ok, but reaching the next level is not a question of goals or metrics. Because you can reach your goals only to see if you need much more., or you can assess a certain milestone only to get ready for the next one.

After a while I realized that the next level is something that cannot be defined. But rather lived. And here’s how I began to live it. (more…)

2009 – The Goals

Today is the last day of  2008, one of the best years of my life, so far. I already made my goal list for 2009. It isn’t a very detailed list in terms of numbers, but it does have a good deal of challenges over what I’ve had in 2008. The numbers are not so important when you think at a whole year, this is something I learned from my last yearly goal list. It’s far more important to define a “red strip” of up to 5 important things you want to manifest and stick with it throughout the whole year.

Here is the sketchy version of my goals for 2009, it’s the first time I do this publicly and I’m really curious if there will be any difference in my goal achievement because of that.

• finalize the move to New Zealand. Although I did  a lot of important steps towards it, like setting up the new company in New Zealand, I’m still on “foreign” land, meaning Romania. I want 2009 to be my first year on New Zealand land.
• overcome my financial results in 2008 with at least 10%. Might seem a little lower as a goal, but knowing that 2008 was my best financial year ever, things are actually much more difficult. Overcoming the results I had in 2008, in terms of personal finances, will require a fantastic stretch. I know that if I manifest only this goal, 2009 will be a terrific year.  I’m committed to do it.
• have at least three 2 weeks long trips outside my country (whichever that might be, at some point). In 2008 I already had 2 long trips in New Zealand and Switzerland. I often find traveling as an effective metaphor of personal development, I have so many “a-ha” moments during my trips and I always come back after a longer trip in a better shape, both mentally and physically.
• read 1 book per week, see 1 movie per week. I need more food for thoughts.
• exercise at least one hour 3 times a week. After last year goal I know I can do this and I want to make it for a total of at least 6 months.
• broadcast more value through dragosroua.com. Not only in terms of content. I already established a good routine of writing at least 15 posts monthly with a peak of 20 posts monthly during November and December. I don’t see any reasons to make this posting speed higher than it is. It can only dilute the message and it will prevent me from creating other forms of value. I’m still a programmer and I also want to write some books, which is something completely different from the blog writing experience.

That’s it. There are only a few hours left. In some parts of the world the New Year Eve is almost there. Time to let the past behind and move on.

I want to finish the last post on my blog for 2008 with a thank you word.

Thank you for reading me. Thank you for criticizing me when you feel the need. Thank you for your feed-back and for your time. Thank you for your success. If you’ll have any breakthrough in your life after reading this blog, I’ll be happy. Knowing that I was able to actually make somebody life’s better is an incredible reward for me.

Happy New Year!

2008 – The Outcome

With only one week left until the official end of the year, I don’t think I’ll have much time to wrap up some of the goals I’ve set for 2008. With an early holiday already started on December 20th I don’t have my focus on achievement monitoring also. So, I guess it’s time to write about how 2008 went for me. I’ll share something with you in the very beginning of this post: I’m somehow scared. I just reviewed my goal list for this year, a list written on the last days of 2007, and I’m amazed how much I accomplished.

First and foremost, this was my best financial year ever. I know this sounds a little bit shameless in the context of a global financial crisis, but I honestly don’t care. I just had my best financial year ever, and the fact that there is also a crisis playing around outside has nothing to do with it. Or with me. Or whatever. This year I made the exit for the company I set up 10 years ago and this was a huge leap forward for me. No need to hide this. It’s not only the financial freedom involved, but much more than that. The financial freedom was only a proof for something much bigger. More on that later, let’s take it the old “step by step” style for now.

As I told you, I am amazed of how much I accomplished, but also I’m somehow scared. I know I should be happy, but I’m still scared. We often function on lower expectancies and when things are coming to us in full flavor, shaped and behaving like we expected them to be, we tend to back up. This is how I feel right now. I feel like “wow, I really did it!”. I’m sure you felt this before, you know how it is. A feeling of satisfaction mixed with a strong vibration of “I just can’t believe this”.

Well, enough with emotions let’s get factual. I won’t give you any exact numbers on my goals. I don’t think the numbers are important, but the commitments are. The list I’ve made for 2008 was made up of 3 sections:

• personal
• professional
• joy

At that time I was still managing Mirabilis Media, the company I’ve created 10 years ago, so my personal and professional path were still pretty mixed.

Personal Goals

The thing that was most important for me on the personal level was my financial income. I don’t think I feel the same way now. But at that time seemed like a priority. I set up a pretty high mark on that. And I did it. Of course, the exit from my company was the key factor in that. Most of my income is now based on that exit.

The second thing was my health, at that time. I’ve set up goals for exercising more (30 minutes per day) and for eating healthier (eating raw food at least two days per week). For the exercise part, I made it for about 1 and a half month from the total of 12 months. For the eating habits, I made it for almost 5 months. But I managed to remain on a raw food eating habit and that is fantastic. Now really, it’s a breakthrough in terms of personal development, no need to hide this.

The third goals was about Bianca’s day care. We managed to have her signed up for the next year, but I think I can safely check this as done, because we did it very well. We both like that specific day care facility and we’re both happy we managed to have her signed up. (more…)

Law Of Attraction And Action

Everybody talks about it. Everybody seems to know everything about it and I guess every second there is another post on some blog about The Law Of Attraction. I first heard about it when I saw The Secret, 2 years ago. I was touched by the movie and I was lucky enough to have already seen What The Bleep Do We Know, so I was somehow prepared for more. The movie had quite an impact on me. I do plan to write more about the movie later on, including about what I call the “too-sweet-for-me-layer-of-consumerism” that surrounds the much more difficult to ingest core of the film. But for now I’d like to share some of my opinions about The Law Of Attraction and what makes it really work for you. And that would be: Action.

First of all, The Law Of Attraction wasn’t discovered with The Secret. It was there all the time, only with different names. I guess every major religion had a way to convey this: “as above, so beneath”, “what’s inside is outside”, and so on. So it’s not a major breakthrough of the movie. The major breakthrough of the movie was the fact that was able to communicate it in a very simple way to a massive audience. That was the real hit behind The Secret.

Second, The Law Of Attraction works whether you are aware of it, or not. That’s pretty clear for you when you first understand it and then try to remember your life. It’s like somebody has lit a torch in front of you. It suddenly becomes clear. Your whole life revealed to you in such a simple and logical structure, that you could never use another way to describe it. It always works, whether you are aware of it or not.

What Is The Law Of Attraction?

It’s the fact that everything you think becomes reality. Everything you want becomes reality. Everything you intend becomes reality. It’s the proof that you are of divine essence, being able to create your own universe.

Everything you do, think or intend, has a vibration. Your body has a vibration. Your thoughts are carrying a vibration, and I mean the physical electromagnetic charges that are composing the synapses. Your brain works on 4 different brainwaves, from alertness to sleep. You communicate by using air vibrations called words. Everything around you is vibration, even if the scientific tools are sometimes too obtrusive to measure it, like in thoughts or intentions. (more…)

Making Money With A Purpose

Thinking of money lately, I am more and more inclined to assimilate it with a type of energy. There are so many resemblances yet so many confusion regarding this topic, and that’s because money is such an obsession in modern society. In this post I’ll use a simple analogy to explain why I think people don’t get enough money, what is happening when they get more money they could handle, and how to let into your life a wider flow of money. For a quick introduction of this concept, you can read first the article about money and you.

First and foremost, I assume that everybody knows how electricity works. It’s a type of energy man uses to enhance his environment (don’t bother for now to think how it is produced, that’s not the point). Let’s think for a minute how you use electricity. Most often, you activate a switch, and start enjoying the benefits. You make light in a dark room, or you make your environment warmer, or you listen to music, or watch movies. Behind all of this is electricity, which is a form of energy. And behind its usage, is you, with a purpose: of making light, or warmth, or interact with information.

Have you tried to use electricity directly? By literally putting your fingers into a power outlet? Unless you have serious integration problems or you’re less than 3 year old (in which case you’re not even able to read this), I bet you never wanted to do something like this. Why? Because interacting directly with a source of energy is highly dangerous for your physical body. You can have serious negative health effects if you try to manipulate electricity directly. But when you use it with a purpose – other than direct interaction – like producing light or warmth, electricity serves you well. (more…)