7 Things I Learned From My 5 Year Old Girl

A few weeks ago it was Bianca’s 5th birthday. As always, each year I write a post about what I learned from her during the last year. If you want to read the previous posts, here they are, in order for one, two, three and four year anniversaries.

1. Diplomacy Is Easy

Last year Bianca’s mother and I parted ways. For me it was an incredibly relieving and lightening event and I’m increasingly happy with this new context of my life. But for Bianca there were a few difficult situations. Although I do my best to keep a normal communication flow with her mother, glitches are occurring every now and then. I can’t control those glitches (being only one part of the discussion). The only thing I can do is to manage them. But at some point I realized something absolutely incredible: Bianca was actually helping me around. In a “childish” and selfless way, of course. Every time I had one of those glitches, she was doing her best to smooth things out. Again, I don’t think it was a conscious plan. I think she is just learning how to handle both me and her mother in this new context. And she’s doing this with a fantastic sense of diplomacy. I literally learned from her when and how to talk and when and why to shut up in a variety of situations. And I’m still learning this.

2. If You Don’t Know, Ask Around

Last year was the year of “why?” questions. I already told you that she is a diplomate. But that only means she is picking the right time to ask his gazillion questions she had to ask, not that she is not asking at all. I had to answer, as usual, the weirdest questions you can imagine, but that only made me realize how powerful this option is. When you don’t know something, just go around and ask. Don’t guess. Don’t imagine. Say out loud what you don’t know or what you don’t understand, or what you think is wrong. Chances are that your questions will be answered sooner than you think.

3. Being Happy Doesn’t Need A Reason

Bianca is happy about everything. Of course, there are contexts which are not pleasant for her, as for anybody else. For instance, every time we split after the time we spend together, she is sad. But after she finished with this separation sadness, she’s happy again. She expressed what she had to express (and I never try to refrain her from doing that) and then she returns to her natural state. Which is being happy just about everything. Too often we forget that. Too often we prefer to cling on our own sadness, or anger or frustration long after the cause of whatever bad feelings we had disappeared. And in this process we create tons and tons of reasons for hating our life. And we forget that we don’t need reasons for being happy. Happiness is an unreasonable state of our being. It’s also the fundamental state of our being.

4. Adaptation Is Evolution

In the separation process Bianca had to deal with a lot of changes. She moved away from her house, she changed school and she had to cope with a lot of new persons from her mother new or old circle of friends. But she coped with this incredibly well. Sometimes I think she has some magic powers that she summons every time she needs to overcome something in front of her. But then I realize we all have these powers, we all have this incredible ability to adjust and adapt, we just have to find it and let it manifest. After I identified this ability in Bianca I soon realized that I had this too. And so the processes of reverting back to parts of my old life I lost in the last 5 years or reinventing parts of my new life started to unfold much faster than before. I hardly remember how I lived just a few months ago. And when I do, I hardly recognize the reasons for living the way I used to.

5. Thirst For Learning

During last year she started to learn how to write and read. And she’s doing it like all the time. This isn’t like she has some time for doing her homework and then going back to “play”. She is learning every single second and her curiosity never stops. Somehow, she finds a way to enjoy and mentally devour every single piece of new information that enters her horizon. She learns lyrics from radio tunes. She plays small dialogues. She tells stories about her friends at school. Every single second she learns. And whenever I’m with her I refill my curiosity too. As adults, we lost this. We think we know everything. We weakened our curiosity muscle and let boredom conquer everything we have inside.

6. Test Newcomers

Bianca is never engaging into direct interactions. The first few seconds are for testing. Yes, this is against social norms. When somebody is saying “hello” to you, the norm is stating that you should instantly reply with a “hello” too. Well, Bianca doesn’t really give a damn about this norm. And I’m so happy that she doesn’t. She only engages in new interactions (if she engages at all) after at least 20-30 seconds of attentive research. This initial period of testing is so important for any new encounter we have. We give in to social games and we move forward based on dry convention and not on our own feelings about the other person. Sometimes I think my life would have been completely different if only I would take the time to test all the newcomers in my life, just as Bianca does.

7. The Will To Win

Lately, we started to play games together more and more. She really wants to win. As I am more of a “just playing the game is good enough” type of guy, her attitude is a very good reminder to pursue the winning game. Yes, the journey is the destination, but winning every once in a while, focusing on the victory, well, that’s something that pushes us forward. And Bianca really a has a lot of this. Every time after I finish a game in which she won, I carefully study her joy. And, little by little, I start to incorporate this desire to win too. Yes, being in the game is what counts.

But boy, that victory feels so good, isn’t it?

Playgrounds And Balloons

I was with Bianca at a playground the other day. She was drifting around, playing with as many toys as she can touch, the plastic, soft ones, being her favorites. Building a house out of plastic bricks, floating in a pool made by plastic balls and so on.

At some point, an entertainer came in. You know the type, dressed as a clown, shouting and blowing up balloons in different shapes. In minutes he made a few flowers for the girls, two or three puppies and some swords for the boys. All made out from long, shiny and colored balloons.

Bianca took a balloon shaped sword and came playing with me. The moment I took the balloon sword in my hand I had a strange feeling. Couldn’t define it so I went ahead playing, then Bianca took another ballon shaped toy, this time a flower. And then another one and she started to make a garden around her soft, plastic house.

As I helped her arrange balloon flowers around her house I suddenly realized what my sensation was about. The sword and the flowers felt really solid in my hand. I knew they were just empty, but they felt solid. I also knew that the feeling was made by the pressure of the air inside. The bigger the pressure, the more realistic the feeling. But there was still something missing from feeling. I continued to watch Bianca as she was playing with her little farm.

As we were sitting around our little farm, the inevitable happened: a kid stepped on a balloon and what was a flower two seconds ago, suddenly became just a small pile of lingering plastic sheets. All with a big noise and a little bit of drama, as some kids screamed (and some parents too).

And then it hit me. The whole strange feeling revealed in a split of a second. It was so surprising that I had to sit back on a chair and start writing about it.

The balloons were just illusions, they had no substance. But as Bianca invested all her trust in them, they were not illusions anymore. They were as real as the plastic flowers from her plastic garden. Until somebody stepped on them. At that point, with a big noise and a little bit of drama, the illusion exploded. Normal flowers don’t explode if you step on them. You can change their shape for a few seconds, but you won’t blow them away. They’re not made out of thin air, like the balloons.

Our Own World Of Balloons

We live surrounded by two types of structures: the ones that our environment is giving to us (also known as reality) and then ones that we are creating ourselves, by blowing air into some empty shapes (also known as illusions).

We blow air into a partner, making him or her take the shape we want. We blow air into a career, giving it the shape we think it’s appropriate. We also blow air into a lifestyle, making it resemble to something we think we want. And we continue to live our lives surrounded by this mix of reality and illusions, until something tragic happens. Until somebody steps on our partner, career or lifestyle, transforming it into a pile of lingering plastic sheets.

Two seconds ago, you were playing with this partner you think you know, and, in a split of a second, he or she is just not there anymore. Instead, there’s something with no form, or volume, or consistency. Just nothing. Your first major challenge acted like a sting. A small sting able to deflate in a few seconds what you thought it’s indestructible.

We call these situations “bad times”. You know, when we lose our jobs or get dumped. Or when a crisis strikes with so much power that everything seems to vanish. Of course, not everything is vanishing. Only the balloons. But when your world is made almost entirely of balloons you will feel like the whole universe is going down.

Inflatable Life And The Heavy Bricks

Truth is we like these inflatable balloons. As we drift from one place to another in our own grown-ups playgrounds, we like to blow into a few days relationship and start playing with it. It’s fast, it seems easier and it doesn’t require any effort from our part. We don’t have to use the heavy bricks. It’s just there, fully formed after just a few chit chats and some social games. We can start using it immediately. And then, of course, it blows at the first sign of pressure. Leaving us as empty as we were when we entered it.

The same thing with our career. We like to pick a shiny and beautifully curved shape, as we saw at other kids, and start blowing some air into it. Of course, this shiny, empty form will stand up for as long as the weather will be fine. The first sign of crisis will blow it away. We will have nothing more than a pile of lingering plastic sheets, with no value.

Using heavy bricks is difficult. It takes time. It takes commitment and discipline. Blowing air into empty balloons doesn’t require any of these. You just blow and voila, your life is filled with beautiful and colored forms. With no volume, of course, but that doesn’t matter as long as life seems light and you’re just floating around, blissfully.

We love to surround ourselves with illusions. It gives us something to cling on and we can safely turn our heads from the things that really matters. Most of the times, those things are difficult. Or they are requiring some major involvement form our part. And we just don’t want to go with them. We just want to “enjoy” our life. Except this life we’re enjoying is made of empty, floating, inconsistent balloons.

Sting It!

You may be in such a bubble right now. You may live in a balloons universe. Some of these balloons may already have small holes in them. And the air is going away and your world seems to be deflating at times. So, you spend most of your times blowing them up again. Keeping the illusion going on.

Well, sting it! Let it blow. This is the only way you can tell the difference. Because, you know, the more air you blow into a balloon, the more consistent it will feel. There will be a point where you won’t be able to tell the difference no more. A balloon relationship, fed with your constant desire of being deluded, will feel just like a regular one.

So, the only way to say if you’re living in the balloons world or in a real world is to sting them. Let the conflict arise. Manage it, but don’t avoid it. Face the crisis. Go through it.

If it’s about your partner, accept anything that could challenge your relationship. You may have blown your own air for way too long, just to keep the things going on. Just stop it. See what’s happening. If on the other side there’s a real person, if you’re functioning as a couple, there will be a balancing reaction. A real person will acknowledge the sting and respond back. If not, the sting will blow the balloon away.

And believe me, there’s nothing to regret about it. What you once knew as your partner, is now nothing but a pile of lingering plastic sheets. No form, no volume, no consistency. And although you’re alone now, you’re not in an illusion anymore.

The Real Garden

As I was staying on my chair in the playground, I started to notice the kids, the balloons and the clown again. Bianca seemed a little bit bored about the games. Balloons were exploding every few minutes and she didn’t seem very keen on the sound.

We went home. First thing we did, after we entered our house, was to water the flowers. Our real flowers. It’s winter now, and the plants are needing much more care than usual. But we both know that in the spring, the plants that were really taken care of, will blossom again.

A balloon flower will never blossom.

7 Things I Learned From My 4 Year Old Girl

Today is Bianca’s 4th birthday. All my love is with her and it will always be. Following a tradition started 4 years ago, on her first anniversary, I’ll post the 7 lessons I learned from her in the last year.

1. Show Off Your Personality

Every time we go out she surprises us by starting conversations out of the blue with people around. Sometimes it’s the waiter who gets the first line, sometimes it’s just a person walking by who instantly receive a “Hi, I’m Bianca” greeting. Every time we’re in a public place she is relaxed and treats people like they are her own pairs. And I admit that’s such a great lesson, at least for me. People are our own pairs. But our expectations are so narrow and low that we forget that and treat people like assets. Or like enemies. Such a waste of time!

2. If You Don’t Get It For The First Time, Keep Trying

Since she started to talk and to express her needs, things have changed dramatically for us. And for her. She’s asking things for herself and she does that with persistence. Sometimes it’s a toy, sometimes it’s something to eat and most of the time it’s just our presence and time. But if, for whatever reason, we can’t deliver,  she keeps trying. And keeps trying. And keeps trying again. If there’s one word which dramatically changed its meaning since we have Bianca in our lives, that word would be “persistence”.

3. Watch Until You Learn

I noticed that she wants to watch the same movie again and again. At first, I didn’t agree, for the sake of diversity. But if you’ve read number 2 above, you already know that at some point I had to give in. And I was right to do so. She watches movies until she learns them by heart. She never stops, never loses focus, never get bored. Sometimes I wish I have the same focus power, just to be able to immerse myself in whatever thing I’m doing, the same way she’s doing it. I think she learned tremendously just by watching around, fully focused.

4. Habits Are The Easiest Thing

With socializing at the kindergarten came also the effort of waking up early in the morning each day. But I was amazed by how fast she was able to adapt to the new schedule. She started to wake up at 6:30 AM and to go to bed at 7:30 PM in about a week. A huge role in this habit creation played Diana, of course, who actually shaped this habit for her, but once she learned it, she’s using it on autopilot. Every time I want to start a new habit, I’m thinking how easy it is for a child to ignite one. Somehow, we seem to lose that flexibility over the years.

5. Stay With The Problem Until You Find The Solution

Last year, she started kindergarten at an English school (she is born Romanian and still live in Romania). She had a short experience before at another English kindergarten but not at such a higher level: more kids, bigger space, extremely diverse schedule. She had a slow start, but now she’s really ok. In fact, her half-year reports from the teacher surprised both of us in term of progress and evolution. Seeing her everyday didn’t help us to understand how much she grew up. That’s one of the biggest lessons I learned from her: stay there and do you job.

6. Don’t Fake It

Every once in a while she tries to fake it until she gets it. She fakes crying for a toy, or something like this. Well, she doesn’t get it. Every now and then she still tries though, just to check in, I suppose. Faking until you get it it’s a stupid thing. Many so called Law Of Attraction gurus are giving this advice: pretend like you’re already rich. Well, it’s big difference between “pretend” and “act”. Every time Bianca is authentic she gets everything she asks for. The moment she starts to fake it, the Universe (meaning us, at this age) closes his gates and nothing gets out anymore.

7. You Cannot Have Enough Laughter In Your Life

Every situation can be – and most of the time is – a reason for laughing. We laugh at the weather, we laugh at chairs or at tables, we laugh at dogs and cats, we laugh at each other. I don’t think I laughed so much in my entire life. During last year I rediscovered the value of laughing as a normal reaction to stuff. Grown ups are taking things way too seriously. And the saddest part is that not all of them have a kid around to show them how stupid is to worry, or to take things for much more than they really are: just things. That you can laugh at, if you choose to.

7 Things I Learned From My 3 Year Old Girl

Today is Bianca’s 3rd anniversary. She is the most precious gift life gave me so far. I am just happy to be around her and she is making me so happy just by being around.

Since she came into our lives, everything changed. Each year, I find myself learning more from her than from my books, my personal development workshops, my any other source of information . When she was one, I learned that “Once you’re down, there are literally a gazillion ways to get up again.” which, along with other 6 things made from my first round of 7 things I learned from my one year girl. When she was two, I learned that “The world is what you say it is” which, along with other 6 things made from my second round of 7 things I learned from my two year old girl.

This is what I learned from my 3 year old daughter last year:

1. Do things on your own

During the last year she had an irrepressible need of doing things on her own. She wants to be there when I assemble furniture, when I plant trees in the garden, when I clean the house, when I cook, when I write, when I check my emails on my iPhone. And she wants to do everything I do, on her own. Maybe some of her experiences are difficult and she’s having a hard time trying to do complicated stuff but she’s enjoying every second of it. Life is better when is experienced first hand.

2. Love is the same, regardless of the loved persons

Her mom, my beloved wife Diana, is having a special relationship with her. They’re playing together, they’re laughing together, they’re watching cartoons together. With me, she is trying to play games or to help me with harder tasks. With her grand parents, she’s inventing on the spot some new moves or activities. With her English kindergarten friends – although she’s not speaking yet very good English – she’s playing like nothing is wrong. Love is the same and is coming from the inside, it’s not a function of the person you love.

3. Making friends is the easiest thing in the world

I’m amazed by her capacity to relate with unknown persons. When we eat out, every waiter is trying to talk with her and she is so responsive, like she knows the guy from the day she was born. She doesn’t reject anybody, unless the person is really annoying and/or boring. Kids don’t have social constraints when it comes to relationships, they’re just interacting naturally with everybody around. No need to exchange cards, phone numbers or to ask for a favor. Bianca is making friends like this is the easiest thing in the world. And I learned from her that this is the easiest thing in the world.

4. Don’t fake it

When she wants something, she really wants something. If she doesn’t get it, she cries. Instantly and with big tears. And you know what: she doesn’t fake it. When she is happy she can laugh for  half an hour continuously. And she doesn’t fake it either. When she’s upset, she’s really upset. When she’s joyful, she’s really joyful. I don’t think I ever saw her faking something, even when she’s trying to pretend she’s upset, she’s so authentic about her pretending. There’s no need to fake sadness or joy, things are so much better when you give yourself permission to be authentic.

5. Learning is better

Last year she had an uninterrupted flow of lessons: she started to talk, she started going to the kindergarten, she started to be more and more autonomous. She’s embracing totally every new experience and she is silently learning. Even when she is not sharing things with us or when she’s not learning directly from us we know that she’s listening, she’s watching and she’s integrating every experience into her life. At some moment we’re just amazed by an unexpected phrase she said, or with a certain sequence of activities she performs on her own, without any help from us. Learning is better.

6. Endless playing

I am amazed about her capacity to play. In every place, in every situation, in every physical state. She plays when she’s tired, she plays when she’s happy, she plays when she’s outside the house, when she’s alone, when she’s with us, she plays everywhere. If I would look through her eyes I’m sure I would see the world as a huge playground, a place created and maintained for our infinite appetite to play. And I love to look at the world through her eyes.

7. Always like the first time

Last year she started to look at short cartoon movies. In fact, with her astounding learning capacity, she started to learn almost all Disney movies we have. But despite the fact she knows the movies by heart (and she can even sing some small passages from Mamma Mia) she constantly ask as to play the same movie again and again. The joy she’s expressing each time is fantastic. It seems like each time she looks at a movie is like the first time. And, in fact, she is. And I learned how to do the same: I can look at the same thing a thousand time and still find something new in it.

I just can’t wait to see what I will learn this year.

2008 – The Outcome

With only one week left until the official end of the year, I don’t think I’ll have much time to wrap up some of the goals I’ve set for 2008. With an early holiday already started on December 20th I don’t have my focus on achievement monitoring also. So, I guess it’s time to write about how 2008 went for me. I’ll share something with you in the very beginning of this post: I’m somehow scared. I just reviewed my goal list for this year, a list written on the last days of 2007, and I’m amazed how much I accomplished.

First and foremost, this was my best financial year ever. I know this sounds a little bit shameless in the context of a global financial crisis, but I honestly don’t care. I just had my best financial year ever, and the fact that there is also a crisis playing around outside has nothing to do with it. Or with me. Or whatever. This year I made the exit for the company I set up 10 years ago and this was a huge leap forward for me. No need to hide this. It’s not only the financial freedom involved, but much more than that. The financial freedom was only a proof for something much bigger. More on that later, let’s take it the old “step by step” style for now.

As I told you, I am amazed of how much I accomplished, but also I’m somehow scared. I know I should be happy, but I’m still scared. We often function on lower expectancies and when things are coming to us in full flavor, shaped and behaving like we expected them to be, we tend to back up. This is how I feel right now. I feel like “wow, I really did it!”. I’m sure you felt this before, you know how it is. A feeling of satisfaction mixed with a strong vibration of “I just can’t believe this”.

Well, enough with emotions let’s get factual. I won’t give you any exact numbers on my goals. I don’t think the numbers are important, but the commitments are. The list I’ve made for 2008 was made up of 3 sections:

• personal
• professional
• joy

At that time I was still managing Mirabilis Media, the company I’ve created 10 years ago, so my personal and professional path were still pretty mixed.

Personal Goals

The thing that was most important for me on the personal level was my financial income. I don’t think I feel the same way now. But at that time seemed like a priority. I set up a pretty high mark on that. And I did it. Of course, the exit from my company was the key factor in that. Most of my income is now based on that exit.

The second thing was my health, at that time. I’ve set up goals for exercising more (30 minutes per day) and for eating healthier (eating raw food at least two days per week). For the exercise part, I made it for about 1 and a half month from the total of 12 months. For the eating habits, I made it for almost 5 months. But I managed to remain on a raw food eating habit and that is fantastic. Now really, it’s a breakthrough in terms of personal development, no need to hide this.

The third goals was about Bianca’s day care. We managed to have her signed up for the next year, but I think I can safely check this as done, because we did it very well. We both like that specific day care facility and we’re both happy we managed to have her signed up. (more…)

7 Things I Learned From My 2 Year Old Girl

Every year I learn something from my daughter. You know, we think that we’re here to help them learn something, but most of the time is the other way around. Last year I learned my first 7 things form her, and it’s time for me to share what are the other 7 things I learned this year.

There is no such thing as tiredness

Every time she is going to bed is because she wants it, not because she’s tired. It’s like a little concession she’s making to us, the parents, when she sees that we barely can keep our eyes opened. Tiredness is a state of mind. The way she is connected with other sources of energy, and her uninterrupted flow of actions, are just so incredible. I just want to reconnect to those sources sometimes…

No hard feelings

She’s never having any regrets at all. I start to believe that regrets are the invention of the grown up people. It’s something that we invented in order to escape happiness. The gap between her sadness and happiness moments is zero. She’s moving through her emotions with zero efforts and zero regrets. Whenever I manage to do this I’m experiencing an incredible state of joy and happiness…

The world is what you say it is

She doesn’t speak yet in a very understandable way but we managed to learn all her vocabulary and we know that this word means that, and that word means that. It’s funny how you can create your own vocabulary and describe reality in a very personal way. It’s even funnier when other people are starting to understand you and share your own reality. You can really make your own world, if you want it…

The work is my playground

She does things very seriously by playing and she plays very seriously by doing things. She’s doing everything with the same intensity and with the same joy, and doesn’t make any difference between work and play. Again, whenever I can do this myself, and mix my work and pleasure, I feel blessed. It should always be like this: to play for work and work with a playful mindset.

I care for others, therefore I exist

She started to identify obstacles and potential dangers and she is starting to cautiously prevent us. One day she told me out of the blue in the car, while I was driving: “Pay attention!”. It’s like she’s starting to give back what we are saying to her in a mirror, like a channel that is starting to flow back to us. And is not only about obstacles and dangers, the channel is giving also love and compassion…

Don’t hate, ignore

I’m amazed about the way she’s treating other kids. If she likes them, she’s playing with them. If not, she’s simply ignoring them, regardless of what they are doing. She doesn’t know the word “revenge”, nor the concept itself, and even if she’s forced to share the same space with an aggressive kid, she’s just ignoring him. It’s like the other guy doesn’t exists in the same space. So much to learn from this…

Everyone can (and sometimes wants) to be manipulated

The moment she learned to conscioussly cry, she learned how to manipulate us. We’re doing our best not to fall for these phases, but it’s not about that. It’s about the fact that most of the people can (and most of the time want) to be manipulated (please read “influenced” here), and that’s one of the most important things she taught me. Don’t think everything or everyone is set in stone, you can change everything or everyone – including yourself – if you really want…

[tags]parenting, personal development[/tags]

7 Things I Learned From My One Year Old Girl

As some of you may recall, I have a one year old girl. These days I was in the fortunate position of spending more time with her. And, while playing and preparring meals and feeding her, it just hit me: I have learned a tremendous amount of stuff from her, during this last year. So here is a small list:

1. Once you’re down, there are literally a gazillion ways to get up again. It only takes just a few new moves to be learned, or a better and innovative usage of the environment…
2. If you don’t want to do a thing (like eating your vegetables, for instance, or going to sleep) well, there’s nobody in the world who can force you into it. You only do what you really want…
3. If you do want something badly, then, no matter how many obstacles in the way, how many interdictions from the parents, if you truly and honestly want that thing, and if you are reasonably loudly letting the world knowing about that, well, eventually you’ll get it…
4. You do not depend on toys. Most of the time, for adult people, toys are translated by: you cannot have enough plasma tv, shiny laptops or expensive cars. But, in the end, nothing compares with a walk in the afternoon. Toys are nice, but you can do even better without them…
5. You cannot have enough hugs in your life. Regardless of the nature of the hugged object: being it a teddy bear, a plastic puppet, or just your exhausted parents, trying to put you to sleep… At any time in your life, if a hug opportunity is coming, don’t miss it…
6. Talk is not really necessary. Many times, words are just staying in your way. You can have a decent level of communication only by being yourself. Sooner or later they will get to know you and you’ll communicate without words.
7. If you really like something, doing it over and over again will not make you bored. You can play with your daddy’s watch, or with your mom’s bracelet hundreds of times, with the same level of joy like the first time. As long as you really enjoy it…

Diapers versus Banners

This evening, while I was preparing Bianca, my one year old daughter, for sleep, I surprised myself responding to my wife, when asked if I would be in the main room in two minutes: “Just a second, I misplaced the banner on Bianca, I have to put it on again…” It was about diapers, not banners, of course, but then I realised how deep I am into my job assignment goals…

It was a little frightening to discover that, but since I would be ready in less than 2 weeks with this project (the launch is scheduled for 21st May) I took it easy on myself. After all, coding 8 to 10 hours a day, testing, refactoring, optimizing and managing the real-life logistic at the same time (making sure all the clients will be notified about the change, the user accounts will be safely transferred, and so on) it’s not an easy task. It’s hard work. Of course, I would expect great results, but for now it’s just hard work.

So, just for the fun of it, I indulged myself with several other contexts in which my regular answers are replaced by coding-world messages. Here’s a basic list I compiled in about 10 minutes:

• Bianca, don’t play with the washing machine buttons! => The website is taking too long to respond
• Diana (my wife): “Dragos, did you buy me beginner signs for the car?” (She just had her driver license several weeks ago, and she really wants others to notice that she is a beginner) => Memory exhausted at line 0, 2 kilobytes needed out of 1 kilobyte assigned to domestic tasks
• Diana: “So, we are going to the park. are you joining us?” => Wrong parameters count for function getOut(), $dragos is undefined
• Diana: “Dragos, did you clean up the car today? => A PHP error occured in your application, severity: WARNING!
• Bianca, do you want to go to sleep? (she’s one year old, remember?) => function goToSleep() is not a member of the class $bianca
• Bianca, please tell to aunt Angie some of the poetry you already know, although you are just one year old! => Parse error at line 1
• Diana: “Let’s go to a movie tonight!” => Max connection number: 1, reached for user $diana, try raising the connections to this requester
• Bianca, where’s my shaving cream spray? => Unable to load file $shaving_cream_spray, searched path: “./:/bedroom:/hallway:/kitchen:/car:/even neighbours”

So, I still think these are just jokes, not the beginning of a beautiful friendship with an imaginary pal that talks in variables, uses functions to lose weight, creates libraries when it’s bored and it’s easy to debug . The future will tell us.